那是一场政治纷争。能干的人一愤之下离开。虽然民心都在他那一方，但离开了权力的核心，他始终只能站在外围。后来当权的人不是在掌声中上台。他自己也明白自己人气不足，不过全凭一股雄心他开始推展自己的抱负。他相信实干就会是最好的证明。不过政治啊，除了实力还要有人脉。计划的实行还是得靠人去推动。组织里还是需要援手。当权的人也不拒绝能干的人插手。于是能干的人在欢呼声中回来了。他企图保持中立及作有限度的帮忙，不过过后他上手后，他就变成了组织中最重要的策划员了。当权的人退到旁边，悄悄地把权力交了出去。当活动落幕，组织的成功是有目共睹的。在庆功的仪式上，能干的人为自己的付出和成果感到无比欣慰。已经没有人在乎他的身份。他俨然是组织的领导。当权的人在第一轮的干杯后在一角落下一滴泪。他始终不明白自己的努力为何不被接受。能干的人因为自己的意气用事输掉了上位的机会。结果他付出了一切却失去了自己应得的奖励。两个人输掉了自己，成全了组织的成功。
我在多年后才明白这是一场政治游戏。任何有名位的团体都有政治。怀才不遇的人孤芳自赏，汲汲营营的人无法享受努力的成果，无得无能的人偏偏位高权重。如果你对这些现象不解，我只能说因为你不懂政治。这世界没有一分耕耘一份收获，只有政治。人与人的关系就是政治。
Saturday, August 19, 2006
Thursday, August 17, 2006
幻灭
那是一种梦想幻灭的遗憾。对比令人失望。我只能感慨，却无力改变。困局。
我失去了驾驭的力量。我在全新的荒野拓荒。我犁好了田，却发现那不是我要的果实。我满心欢喜地来到这个新地。我为我踏出的第一步喝彩，却开始失去了走下去的勇气。我不知应该弃守，还是坚持。
我依然风光自在，里面却有股深沉的悲哀。我回头看我遗失的精彩，我为我的前方神伤。
那些逝去的已不再，那些失误不能重来。烦恼的种子已经种下，苦涩即将成熟。我怯于面对，但我避不了收成的季节。
心灰。我走遍了荒野，终于了解到荒田的贫瘠。不再奢望会在荒野遇上良田。
我曾欣喜感恩，如今却一脸无奈。我望天打卦，自嘲至少不用勤耕那么辛苦。
年收不济，苦涩满味。我回到家，用精美的糖纸把果实包装起来，佯装成高级的洋货若无其事的叫卖。
我失去了驾驭的力量。我在全新的荒野拓荒。我犁好了田，却发现那不是我要的果实。我满心欢喜地来到这个新地。我为我踏出的第一步喝彩，却开始失去了走下去的勇气。我不知应该弃守，还是坚持。
我依然风光自在，里面却有股深沉的悲哀。我回头看我遗失的精彩，我为我的前方神伤。
那些逝去的已不再，那些失误不能重来。烦恼的种子已经种下，苦涩即将成熟。我怯于面对，但我避不了收成的季节。
心灰。我走遍了荒野，终于了解到荒田的贫瘠。不再奢望会在荒野遇上良田。
我曾欣喜感恩，如今却一脸无奈。我望天打卦，自嘲至少不用勤耕那么辛苦。
年收不济，苦涩满味。我回到家，用精美的糖纸把果实包装起来，佯装成高级的洋货若无其事的叫卖。
Friday, July 28, 2006
混学记
参访的旅程来到了博大。今天的景点是food tech faculty.
我们都爱混入别人的学堂上课。此不良风气由显育首开先河，在混入GBS 一年后，老师和巡查员都已经认不出他是外人了。对此显育至今仍引为美谈，沾沾自喜不已。
星期五早上，我坐上国菁的车准备去上课。过了校园门口，门卫没有检查，我算正式混入博大。
上课有什么好玩？我一走进课室，就在国菁的介绍下和她的朋友会面。大家互相招呼，俨然是同班同学，让那些不知情的旁人则看得一愣愣的。了解国内大专的上课情形是我的参访的主要目的。上别人的课，既可以学到新知识，又不用背负考试的压力，我也乐得在此旁听。这堂课讲的是原料处理，其中还有一些物理的应用。下课后我还趁机问了教授一个问题。大马的学生一向来都不擅发问。我如果能够问上几个有水准的问题唬一唬教授也是爽，只是可惜课程内容相当简单，我只好作罢。
学习本来就应该轻轻松松，考试制度真的是让学习本末倒置了。
我们都爱混入别人的学堂上课。此不良风气由显育首开先河，在混入GBS 一年后，老师和巡查员都已经认不出他是外人了。对此显育至今仍引为美谈，沾沾自喜不已。
星期五早上，我坐上国菁的车准备去上课。过了校园门口，门卫没有检查，我算正式混入博大。
上课有什么好玩？我一走进课室，就在国菁的介绍下和她的朋友会面。大家互相招呼，俨然是同班同学，让那些不知情的旁人则看得一愣愣的。了解国内大专的上课情形是我的参访的主要目的。上别人的课，既可以学到新知识，又不用背负考试的压力，我也乐得在此旁听。这堂课讲的是原料处理，其中还有一些物理的应用。下课后我还趁机问了教授一个问题。大马的学生一向来都不擅发问。我如果能够问上几个有水准的问题唬一唬教授也是爽，只是可惜课程内容相当简单，我只好作罢。
学习本来就应该轻轻松松，考试制度真的是让学习本末倒置了。
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
看医生
第二次造访医生。都是因为皮肤问题。
医生很年轻，三十未满。我指给他看症状，他立即就能说出病因来。他也不看多两眼就径自开药方。两次都是这样。我有点不习惯，这和我一贯被灌输的“小心检查”有冲突。我有点担心。但碍于我还没学到皮肤病，也许他诊断的这类症状其实相当普遍。
我在想以后读Pathology 时书上会不会注明：某某病症非常普遍，所以以后我诊断时就可以缩小范围？还是实习久了，对那些家常便病就会变得得心应手？
我长了颗唇胞。医生说是咬伤化疤，要抽出里面的血液。说完就拿出针筒望着我。光凭想象我就觉得有点恐怖，于是我便拒绝他的提议。医生也不放弃，笑着对我说要当医务人员就要有“自插”的勇气。他自毕业后就自己抽血，也不假手于人。他还说自己曾不施麻药动手把脚上的疮自行割除。
我知道我迟早要面对“敢敢插/割”的勇气问题。我也相信屠夫玩刀久了就敢用屠刀刮胡子。我知道他在给我信心，于是我就答应了。
针管插入唇胞。不久黄色的液体就流了出来。我感到唇胞一下就消了。嘿。
付钱。果然不便宜。Ben 说过GP 是工作最辛苦钱挣最少的。我观察到医生其实有很多门路可以捞钱。连社险的申请表格都有代理。
这里最常开出的药应该是抗生素。我观察到医生开药从不须检查抗药性，每次都用wide band 抗生素就万无一失了。细菌抗药性？谁理？有些问题，例如全球暖化的问题，都是有很多人谈论却没人要真正去补救的。
医生很年轻，三十未满。我指给他看症状，他立即就能说出病因来。他也不看多两眼就径自开药方。两次都是这样。我有点不习惯，这和我一贯被灌输的“小心检查”有冲突。我有点担心。但碍于我还没学到皮肤病，也许他诊断的这类症状其实相当普遍。
我在想以后读Pathology 时书上会不会注明：某某病症非常普遍，所以以后我诊断时就可以缩小范围？还是实习久了，对那些家常便病就会变得得心应手？
我长了颗唇胞。医生说是咬伤化疤，要抽出里面的血液。说完就拿出针筒望着我。光凭想象我就觉得有点恐怖，于是我便拒绝他的提议。医生也不放弃，笑着对我说要当医务人员就要有“自插”的勇气。他自毕业后就自己抽血，也不假手于人。他还说自己曾不施麻药动手把脚上的疮自行割除。
我知道我迟早要面对“敢敢插/割”的勇气问题。我也相信屠夫玩刀久了就敢用屠刀刮胡子。我知道他在给我信心，于是我就答应了。
针管插入唇胞。不久黄色的液体就流了出来。我感到唇胞一下就消了。嘿。
付钱。果然不便宜。Ben 说过GP 是工作最辛苦钱挣最少的。我观察到医生其实有很多门路可以捞钱。连社险的申请表格都有代理。
这里最常开出的药应该是抗生素。我观察到医生开药从不须检查抗药性，每次都用wide band 抗生素就万无一失了。细菌抗药性？谁理？有些问题，例如全球暖化的问题，都是有很多人谈论却没人要真正去补救的。
飘泊记
自返马之后，真正留在家里的时间不多，我又开始到处游玩了。从停泊岛到巴厘岛，我马不停蹄。觉得自己真是闲不住的人，总爱四处猎奇、观光、参访。我在飘泊中找到安定，在流浪中感应存在。就像海上的浮萍，风平浪静时有点迷茫，飘泊时才能感觉到自己的存在。
明天我即将前往多事之城UPM.
明天我即将前往多事之城UPM.
Friday, June 02, 2006
Sunday, May 28, 2006
blogeer
browsing other people's blogs. finding inspiration. also interesting to read people's minds where they can express their own thoughts better than a forum or ordinary website allows.
Wednesday, May 17, 2006
Monday, May 15, 2006
counting lives
a doctor is given high salary because he deals with life and death of 1 people.
a pilot is given higher salary because he deals with the lives of 400 passengers.
hmm...
so is money proportional to number of lives?
how about an air traffic controller that deals with twenty planes, 10,000 people?......
"Studies show the number of airline passengers will grow from about 600 million per year today to about 1 billion by the year 2008. "
Rte 3 "Blackout Effect"
a pilot is given higher salary because he deals with the lives of 400 passengers.
hmm...
so is money proportional to number of lives?
how about an air traffic controller that deals with twenty planes, 10,000 people?......
"Studies show the number of airline passengers will grow from about 600 million per year today to about 1 billion by the year 2008. "
Rte 3 "Blackout Effect"
anticlimax
mayb i had too much expectation. when all exams come to an end and the long waited holiday set in finally, i am not as excited as i think i would be. yea i am completely free now, so what...... a bit anticlimax......
i start surfing net, reading books, watching series, doing all the things that i always wanted to do. i am definitely enjoying myself but i still feel lacking in something. not as enjoyable and relaxing when i was stealing my time during the exam times.
i think: leisure means more to peple who have worked hard for it.
i start surfing net, reading books, watching series, doing all the things that i always wanted to do. i am definitely enjoying myself but i still feel lacking in something. not as enjoyable and relaxing when i was stealing my time during the exam times.
i think: leisure means more to peple who have worked hard for it.
Sunday, May 14, 2006
read more physics before u come and talk to me about "noise"
dear allan,
so we are moving in. and requesting others to cut down the noise is legitimate i noe. yup we will strive to keep noise to a minimum but how can u discuss with me abt "noise" when u dont even noe wat is "decibel"? to avoid any dispute it is better we have eveything in black and white, including the noise level. so pick ur threshold then.
dB Sound
0 threshold of hearing
10 pin dropping at 10 m
20 soft whisper
30 library
40 quiet conversation
50 normal conversation
60 a busy office
70 vacuum cleaner
80 inside a small car
90 lawn mower
100 large orchestra
110 rock music
120 boom stereo in car
130 earphones up loud/ jet plane
140 air raid siren
150 military rifle
so u hv chosen 30-40 dB. goodstuff. at least we are allowed to whisper. but so sorry i forgot to remind u that Loudness is not simply sound intensity! The sound intensity must be factored by the ear's sensitivity to the particular frequencies contained in the sound. This is the kind of information contained in equal loudness curves for the human ear. It must also be considered that the ear's response to increasing sound intensity is a "power of ten" or logarithmic relationship. This is why we are using the decibel scale to measure sound intensity.
so then i will be following this "rule of thumb" ie. an increase in 10dB is approximately twice as loud. glad that we have everything stated clear. do enjoy ur stay in the new house. we will have 4 years to spend together. yup tolerance is the key to living together. so i will have the decibel scale photocopied and give it to everyone in the house. plus i will make a couple of "silence is gold" slogans and paste them all around the house, especially for u.
thankful? oh u should be. remember to clean the house with us ya...
p/s click on the above links it is good for your physics, at least let you have a more precise description of "noise" and your "noise intolerance syndrome" (diagnosed by Hong Tak)
with care,
SH
so we are moving in. and requesting others to cut down the noise is legitimate i noe. yup we will strive to keep noise to a minimum but how can u discuss with me abt "noise" when u dont even noe wat is "decibel"? to avoid any dispute it is better we have eveything in black and white, including the noise level. so pick ur threshold then.
dB Sound
0 threshold of hearing
10 pin dropping at 10 m
20 soft whisper
30 library
40 quiet conversation
50 normal conversation
60 a busy office
70 vacuum cleaner
80 inside a small car
90 lawn mower
100 large orchestra
110 rock music
120 boom stereo in car
130 earphones up loud/ jet plane
140 air raid siren
150 military rifle
so u hv chosen 30-40 dB. goodstuff. at least we are allowed to whisper. but so sorry i forgot to remind u that Loudness is not simply sound intensity! The sound intensity must be factored by the ear's sensitivity to the particular frequencies contained in the sound. This is the kind of information contained in equal loudness curves for the human ear. It must also be considered that the ear's response to increasing sound intensity is a "power of ten" or logarithmic relationship. This is why we are using the decibel scale to measure sound intensity.
so then i will be following this "rule of thumb" ie. an increase in 10dB is approximately twice as loud. glad that we have everything stated clear. do enjoy ur stay in the new house. we will have 4 years to spend together. yup tolerance is the key to living together. so i will have the decibel scale photocopied and give it to everyone in the house. plus i will make a couple of "silence is gold" slogans and paste them all around the house, especially for u.
thankful? oh u should be. remember to clean the house with us ya...
p/s click on the above links it is good for your physics, at least let you have a more precise description of "noise" and your "noise intolerance syndrome" (diagnosed by Hong Tak)
with care,
SH
Friday, May 12, 2006
absent minded
20060512
1.30pm
one hour after we finish exam, i found that i was not as delighted that i think i would. feel that the 3hr BH paper jz sucked away all my mind.
2.10pm
wandering in the com lap, boole and the school. still duno wat am i doing here. i think i should have something to do but i just feeling empty.
2.30pm
found that my phone was not in my pocket. must have left it in the exam hall. damn.
2.35pm
completely devastated when the invigilator said they didt find anything. start staring at the student sitting at table 32 in the middle of his exam.
2.40pm
retrieved my phone after unlocking it right in front of the receptionist. luckily i can still remember the pin despite my mind was almost blank.
2.55pm
back to home. still absent minded. lucky didt langgar any tiang.....
1.30pm
one hour after we finish exam, i found that i was not as delighted that i think i would. feel that the 3hr BH paper jz sucked away all my mind.
2.10pm
wandering in the com lap, boole and the school. still duno wat am i doing here. i think i should have something to do but i just feeling empty.
2.30pm
found that my phone was not in my pocket. must have left it in the exam hall. damn.
2.35pm
completely devastated when the invigilator said they didt find anything. start staring at the student sitting at table 32 in the middle of his exam.
2.40pm
retrieved my phone after unlocking it right in front of the receptionist. luckily i can still remember the pin despite my mind was almost blank.
2.55pm
back to home. still absent minded. lucky didt langgar any tiang.....
Wednesday, May 10, 2006
休息和走路
有时会佩服allan的意志力。考试每告一段落，大家都会相聚轻松一下，希望休息后可以走更长远的路。但有的人就是有这份能耐，可以毫无倦怠的继续读下去。昼夜相续，晨昏不断，就一股劲地读下去。这也可算是超人的毅力吧！
如果人生可以不休息，进度应该可以快十倍有余。
但是人生并不只是走路而已。休息不是intron，可以被裁去无碍。只会赶路的人，辜负了沿途的风景，也荒废了自己的生命。赶路的人以为终点就是全部，殊不知过程才是生命的目的。走路，有时只是为了休更久的息。
这个夏天，放下庸碌，悠闲自在。
点播：陈升《六月》
如果人生可以不休息，进度应该可以快十倍有余。
但是人生并不只是走路而已。休息不是intron，可以被裁去无碍。只会赶路的人，辜负了沿途的风景，也荒废了自己的生命。赶路的人以为终点就是全部，殊不知过程才是生命的目的。走路，有时只是为了休更久的息。
这个夏天，放下庸碌，悠闲自在。
点播：陈升《六月》
Tuesday, May 09, 2006
同居
有人说：同居是婚姻的试金石，如胶似漆的恋人一旦朝夕共处，才发现梦中情人完全变了样。
我说：同居也是友谊的试金石，情同手足的好友同住一个屋檐下，才发现对方的种种习性及癖好。
相见好，同住难，古今屡试不爽。听了太多耳闻口传的故事，见识了千奇百怪的众生相，难免心有余虑、战战兢兢。
2006年6月1日，开始了我和朋友同居一屋的日子。未来四年的同居生涯，会有什么事情发生呢？且让时间解开这一切...
我说：同居也是友谊的试金石，情同手足的好友同住一个屋檐下，才发现对方的种种习性及癖好。
相见好，同住难，古今屡试不爽。听了太多耳闻口传的故事，见识了千奇百怪的众生相，难免心有余虑、战战兢兢。
2006年6月1日，开始了我和朋友同居一屋的日子。未来四年的同居生涯，会有什么事情发生呢？且让时间解开这一切...
Monday, May 08, 2006
rented... in 5 min
men always lament on the way women shopping on impulse. men nonetheless are equally impulsive when it comes to buying a car or ... a house.
today we made the most reckless decision in our life... in less than 5 minutes, we decided on a house in summerstown. then we handed in the deposit, and in an hour time, we were already holding the key of the house.
the house is quite ok but r we a bit too desperate?
guess this is the way guys deal with options... 当机立断
(didt u all realise that we actually agreed that the room shouldnt be any smaller than Sean's room?)
p/s after talking others, i think we are so thoughtless and reckless.
we visited the house at night and overlooked so many problems.
we were in a rush and forgot to ask important questions.
we tried to be polite and didt bargain at all.
we think are not being picky... in fact we are juz being slipshod.....
last editted 20060516
after talking to terry....
pp/s 有恃无恐的人可以逞强好胜
没有后台的人只能委曲求全
the advantaged ppl speak of their wants;
the disadvantaged ppl speak of their compromise
after talking to sean
today we made the most reckless decision in our life... in less than 5 minutes, we decided on a house in summerstown. then we handed in the deposit, and in an hour time, we were already holding the key of the house.
the house is quite ok but r we a bit too desperate?
guess this is the way guys deal with options... 当机立断
(didt u all realise that we actually agreed that the room shouldnt be any smaller than Sean's room?)
p/s after talking others, i think we are so thoughtless and reckless.
we visited the house at night and overlooked so many problems.
we were in a rush and forgot to ask important questions.
we tried to be polite and didt bargain at all.
we think are not being picky... in fact we are juz being slipshod.....
last editted 20060516
after talking to terry....
pp/s 有恃无恐的人可以逞强好胜
没有后台的人只能委曲求全
the advantaged ppl speak of their wants;
the disadvantaged ppl speak of their compromise
after talking to sean
Saturday, May 06, 2006
exam syndrome 谵妄
读医是打一场长战，三五七年不止。
给你山高的书本、海量的知识，加上道德的凝视、伦理的纠结，让你读得面容枯槁、形销骨立、天旋地转；然后期待你披上白褂，变成一个健康的医生，有条不紊地治理病人。
真是置之死地而后生...
医学院能让书呆子之辈加剧奋（斗）不顾身（体）；
但我们自己的醒觉呢？
嗜食饕餮继续享用煎炸快餐；
长期烟民持续吞云吐雾如故。
几时开始医生和健康再也扯不上关系？
我们学习病理学，只想到用在病人身上。为什么考试前总会有股生病浪潮侵袭？真的要置之死地而后生吗？...不知如何料理自己，怎样医治别人？
exam syndrome
characterised by continuous elevated of cortisol
palpitation, dyspnoea, cold clammy hands，hypertension
aggravated by prolonged immobility, lack of exercise
in severe case: derangement, immune disorder, delirium, bs in blogsite etc.
给你山高的书本、海量的知识，加上道德的凝视、伦理的纠结，让你读得面容枯槁、形销骨立、天旋地转；然后期待你披上白褂，变成一个健康的医生，有条不紊地治理病人。
真是置之死地而后生...
医学院能让书呆子之辈加剧奋（斗）不顾身（体）；
但我们自己的醒觉呢？
嗜食饕餮继续享用煎炸快餐；
长期烟民持续吞云吐雾如故。
几时开始医生和健康再也扯不上关系？
我们学习病理学，只想到用在病人身上。为什么考试前总会有股生病浪潮侵袭？真的要置之死地而后生吗？...不知如何料理自己，怎样医治别人？
exam syndrome
characterised by continuous elevated of cortisol
palpitation, dyspnoea, cold clammy hands，hypertension
aggravated by prolonged immobility, lack of exercise
in severe case: derangement, immune disorder, delirium, bs in blogsite etc.
Thursday, May 04, 2006
working hard?
i thought i have been slacking, but comparing with others make me think that i am working very hard;
i thought i have been working very hard, but the exam jz crushed my belief....
i have my own ruler, but i dont know when it really applies...
i thought i have been working very hard, but the exam jz crushed my belief....
i have my own ruler, but i dont know when it really applies...
setback
a good beginnning is only halfway to success.
faced setback today. right in front of CVS. sigh.
终于知道什么是“面露菜色”了。
faced setback today. right in front of CVS. sigh.
终于知道什么是“面露菜色”了。
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
dreadful start
in addition... dont go to bed with an empty stomach...
gosh... cant sleep all night jz bcuz i m hungry....walau-a
gosh... cant sleep all night jz bcuz i m hungry....walau-a
advice for all exam candidates
pls be refrain from doing things that can impair ur ability to go to the exam. for example, stop cooking as u may injure ur fingers... dont sleep on the table... nerve compression... exercise like push-up... terry... u may hurt ur arm...
jz a piece of advice...
jz a piece of advice...
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